Recently I was out with my kiddo while he was practicing driving (👏). We passed his old elementary school and he immediately wondered how his old guidance counselor is doing. It's been 13 years since he last saw him.
Yesterday we were discussing topics to have my kiddo back on the podcast and school came up again. This time he was reminiscing about his favorite teacher ever, his 9th and 10th grade SPED teacher.
I asked why that particular teacher was a favorite of them all.
"He saw me as a human first," he said.
"He was interested in how I was, what I liked, and how I was spending my free time. Academics came after that. It made me feel understood when I never did at school."
And there you have it, Reader. Like everything else, it all boils down to feeling seen, heard, and understood.
So, what makes a "good" teacher for kids like ours?
One that shows personal interest. One that listens. One that makes them feel like they belong. One that offers safety.
For me, these things are more powerful than what they are independently, because those qualities also offer co-regulation and connection, which lead to regulation. And regulation optimizes learning... that all-important goal of school.
So maybe some of your conversations with your child's teachers and administrators this year are more about teacher-student relationship than academics, since the first creates more opportunity for the second anyway.
With so much heart,
p.s. — Monday is the first day of Back-to-School Prep Week (although there is an asynchronous track as well). If you want this school year to start differently, Prep Week guides you step-by-step through the preparations that will change this school year. Learn more >>>
368: Preparing for the Back-to-School Transition
with Penny Williams
That end-of-summer dread is real, and it's not the same as bracing for a hard year. In this episode, I share the five areas that make the biggest difference for a smoother back-to-school transition: mornings, bedtime, homework, school meetings, and overwhelm itself. It's not about fixing your child, it's about creating the conditions where you both can feel steady enough to handle what's ahead. Listen to the full episode for all five, plus how to work through them with me live during Back to School Prep Week
Back-to-school doesn't just require a focus on supplies and schedules. It takes strategy. For our kids, "starting school" also means surviving it with your peace and your relationship intact.
If last school year was full of chaotic mornings, dreaded calls, and meltdowns or shutdowns you couldn't see coming, that's a sign that you need a plan built foryour specific kid, not a generic one.
That's what Prep Week is: five days, done with you, building the regulation toolkit, the teacher support summary, and the routines that actually stick. Live or at your own pace, replays are yours to keep.
Here's what Miranda said after last year's Prep Week:
"Each session was so practical, and I appreciated that we could work along with you and come out of the sessions with ready-to-go materials."
There's an asynchronous option if you can't make the live sessions.
I've got you! Whether you're raising or educating neurodivergent kids, teens, or young adults, I can provide some relief and a path to success. Here's how:
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I help parents and teachers of neurodivergent kids trade escalation for regulation using my SIGNAL Parenting™ framework. Award-winning author of Boy Without Instructions and host of the Beautifully Complex Podcast. My core belief: behavior isn't the problem, it's the signal.